I fell out of love with livejournal for quite a while, aided in no little part by a sudden rash of self-consciousness over the very fact that, well, I had a livejournal. It's a sign of my distorted sense of self-image that I can go five days without shaving, and yet my ego is suddenly petrified by the acknowledgement that I have this thing. And fuck you lj, I can spell acknowledgement with an "e" if I like. It's in the CANADIAN OXFORD bitch. Don't you go underlining that shit. I take a course for this. That being said, I'm still going to abuse commas all over the place as I tend to approach this with a tone more conversational than literary. There will probably be lots of dangling modifiers as well. Oh I'm a rebel.
Anyhow, somewhere in the mix of obsessions, compulsions, fears, and neuroses, I decided it's okay to post here again. So let's have a little old-fashion ramble where I comment vaguely on my own life, sporadicly on the world, maybe throw in a line or two of fiction. There will be little in the way of transition, so things will be confusing. It'll be great.
Glossing over the life part - I spent January lounging happily, February despondent, March bottomed out and then prompted a renewed sense of possibility. A dear teacher of mine who died last year used to tell us, "Never say should. Should is the language of defeat." It was good advice then and is good advice now. I'm trying hard to apply it.
I'm finishing stories these days. Slow going, but the point is they're getting done instead of sitting in half-finished limbo. It's important progress. Now to just take that next step and submit them.
I think I'm becoming a fan of the Marble Index.
When the protests in Tibet began to heat up, I immediately thought of the protests in Burma(and I use that name purposefully) last September. It's the sort of event that occurs with a weary familiarity. We all know how these things end(Hint: not well). Anyways, it reminded me of a story I started working on at the time, back when the monks were in the streets and thousands were coming out to support them. It had two titles and I couldn't decide between them so I just wrote "A Few Days in Burma / The World Will Not Save You". It wasn't actually about Burma, but rather someone over here reacting to the news. I had already plotted out the scene where they read about the crackdown, and that was before it actually happened. I was sort of saddened by my own cynicism, but of course it was completely justified. The protests were for naught, and by the 27th of September Yangon was a ghost city, the citizens terrified of military reprisals.
Perhaps the Tibetans believe it's different because China is hosting the Olympics. Or maybe they don't believe that. I think that would be even sadder, but it doesn't really matter what they think. I won't watch the Olympics, but that doesn't mean anything.
And now for something completely different.
I've read from several different people now speculating that the reason Hillary is dragging out the Democratic primary is not to win the nomination in 2008, but to win it in 2012 by damaging Obama so badly that he loses to McCain come November. It makes a lot of sense from an "All I care about is being president" standpoint. Sort of a downer if it's true though. Nuts to politics.
The baseball season for 2008 kicked off in Japan this week with two games between Boston and Oakland. I was actually up for one of them (6 am start times.. ugh). I don't sleep well though, so the onus wasn't so great I suppose. I'm glad baseball is back. A game sure, but one I enjoy greatly. the Jays kick off their season in New York and then come home to play the Red Sox, so things are going to open with a bang. The starting pitching is going to have to pull a lot of weight with the uncertainty in the bullpen and the lineup looking sketchy. Injured Rolen + Frank Thomas hitting like .140 in spring training = sad panda.
If one more person tries to rave to me how great "The Wire" is I'm going to punch them in the face. I remember watching the first season years ago and thinking it was cool, but losing track of it because I'm absentminded and lose track of things. That it has suddenly become this phenomena in the last year or so is great and all, but people gushing about it like they've just discovered the Holy Grail need to shut the fuck up. It's been around for years. This is not new.
I've always thought "Americana" was a pretty solid Offspring album. Maybe I'm in the minority though.
I used to claim that I was going to marry Lisa Loeb, and I feel that I must issue a correction. As much as I adore Ms. Loeb, it is now Sarah Slean whom I will be marrying. If someone has a way of conveying her this information that would be great.
You'll notice that in that last sentence the pronoun "her" has two possible antecedents. I figured you'd spot it. You're clever like that.
And now as promised, a snippet of fiction. I wrote this little exchange a while ago but still have yet to find a story to put it in. It makes me laugh though. Enjoy.
"Don't you see? Breaking the window was an important expression of this neutered rage instilled in all of us by an overflow of information about a world that we inevitably realize we are an insignificant part of."
"Man, I guess, but it still sucks that you broke that guy's window. I'd be pissed."
"You're just not seeing the big picture."
"Maybe some asshole broke the big picture and neglected to pay for it."
This was cathartic. I should do it more often.